I've gotten over the stares I get for walking places. I get it; normal people here own and drive cars, it saves them time, it's more comfortable, they can listen to the radio. People walking on the sidewalk around here are poor or have had their license suspended, or both. Or are trying to get exercise (you can tell because everyone here has an outdoor exercise uniform that includes soccer shorts, a light-colored T-shirt, sneakers, and a hair scrunchie). But I rest assured that as gas gets more expensive, more jeans-wearing folk will accompany me on the sidewalks.
I still can't get over the expressions of bewilderment and novelty that I get when I take my bag-lady cart out to the supermarket, though. It's a shopping cart, folks. For groceries. I walk it down to the Harris Teeter (heh heh, teeter) from my apartment, load it up with groceries, and then walk it back up. I mean, I can understand if this is the first time you've seen this particular type of shopping cart, which stands upright and holds no more than a single's average week's consumption of food... but do you have to be so, so... surprised? Is it really that great a conceptual leap from, say, the much larger black wire-grate shopping cart YOU have here in the store? Or that roller-board suitcase you bring to the airport that is the EXACT SAME SIZE AND SHAPE? Yes, it has WHEELS! And I put STUFF in it!! And I take the stuff HOME in it! And it keeps my fingers from looking like RED LINK SAUSAGES from carrying ten plastic bags of food a mile back to my home! But it really is just too much for some people. They feel they must comment on it, as if I was wearing traditional ceremonial garb from a trip to Kenya or something. "My, isn't that something! Are you a 'moslem'?"
When the forces of the Northeast come to conquer and subdue this new land, this new colony, as we have already begun, small bag-lady shopping carts will be standard issue equipment. We will literally paralyze these locals with shock and awe. And save our fingers while we do it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
I think you should make a bumper sticker for the cart, something along the lines of "Exercising and Grocery Shopping at the Same Time! :)" But wittier. Then maybe they'll relax and see you as a regular guy! I used to have a bag-lady cart, and I had to fashion a crude extender handle onto it 'cause it was too short for me! Then I looked even weirder. sigh.
Aren't you glad I'm starting your blog off with all these comments? :)
Reminds me of a Seinfeld episode. Maybe your bumper sticker could say "It's European!"
The weird thing at Harris Teeter (heh heh) is that they don't have the "normal" check-out line, where you empty your own cart onto one conveyor, they scan it and put it on another conveyor, and they bag it. Here, you drive your cart directly into the cashier, s/he unloads and scans stuff in one motion, and there's only one conveyor between the scan and the bag. They put an empty cart at the bagging area, and the bagger loads that cart rather than the one you shopped with. Well, all fine and good until you have a personal connection with YOUR cart, and that fucks up their whole system. They don't know what to do with me... I have to specifically request that they--gee golly--load MY cart with MY stuff. Like, duh... you don't HAVE bag-lady carts and you don't sell them, so hows about you drive that sucker back over here, mmkay?
Post a Comment